Cross One More Thing Off My Life Experience List

Decades have elapsed since I last participated as a member of a nationally broadcast program. I was a knobby-kneed Girl Scout in the 1950’s when my troop visited Don MacNeil’s Breakfast Club in downtown Chicago one early weekday morning. I have vague memories of going down into a basement and filing en masse around the breakfast table as it were (there was no breakfast to be had and instead of going around a table we marched around the room.) But maybe it was an Arthur Godfrey show? The details are sadly lost to the ages.

However, the details of my recent participation on The David Letterman Show will be with me always. Whenever I’ve been in New York City over the last 15 years, I’ve regretted that I hadn’t had the foresight to think ahead and organize passes to the show. Knowing that we would be in NYC to see two Broadway shows (more about them in my next post,) Dennis inquired last summer and then, per directions, applied in early September for two passes to the show on Tuesday, October 4, 2005. Someone from the show called last week and asked Dennis a trivia question (“What’s the name of the red haired guy on the show?”) which Dennis successfully answered. It apparently mattered that he had the correct answer. We were telling some acquaintances who applied for tickets and when they were asked, “Who’s Alan Kalder?” were unable to come up with the answer. Their names were placed on a reserve list and they were never called to be on the show. Anyway, Dennis was told that we needed to report to the ticket office between 3:00 and 4:00 the afternoon of the show to pick up our tickets and to state that we were on the Adam’s Gold List.

Knowing that forgetting that we were on the Adam’s Gold List could spell the difference between getting in or being denied entry to the show, we quizzed each other periodically over the last week so we wouldn’t forget the all-important code.

We showed up at 3:05 yesterday afternoon and had to go to the end of a very long line of folks waiting for their tickets. It was then that we began to appreciate the art and science of crowd control employed by the Letterman Show. After waiting in line for 15 minutes and then showing our picture ID’s, we entered the theater lobby in small groups and were first divided into one of two lines: Adam’s Gold or Bethany’s something. I pointed out to Dennis that this was simply the A list and the B list. Our names were on the A list and we were given official tickets with hand-written numbers, then shepherded back to the outer lobby, where we were penned until there were about 30 of us. There we got our first lesson in yelling loudly, which we discovered is an expected behavior for a Letterman guest. We also got instructions to return exactly at 4:30, so we could be in time for the 5:30 taping, and to line up exactly in sequence according to our ticket numbers and to stand in the yellow section.

When we returned at 4:25, we found the yellow guide tape and stood patiently for another 15-20 minutes while our fellow yellow tapers found their places. At one point, the guy standing in back of us said something about the Cardinals; I asked him where they were from and he said, “Illinois.” With further questioning, we discovered that they live in Champaign, too, and that his wife works at the same clinic that I do. We didn’t recognize each other and never did fully introduce ourselves.

Next we filed into the lobby in tight 2-by-2 Noah’s Ark Style rows, and stood until 5:00, when they finally let us into the studio’s auditorium. During our time in the lobby we were instructed in which sounds not to make (whistles, high pitched yells, moans, etc.) and the usual instructions re: no cell phones, cameras, or recording devices. We also had further tutelage in appropriate enthusiastic laughter, applause, yelling, etc. Our guides in all of the pre-program preparations were young preppie types, the kind of folks who have recently been their schools’ cheer leaders. Once seated in the auditorium, they continued the effort to keep us loud and excited; I noted that several of the young women were so physically involved in their cheering that they should have no physiologic need to go to aerobics classes, as much exercise as they get on the job.

We were seated in the 6th row from the front, over on the far left (looking from the stage) aisle, so the view was somewhat obstructed by the various cameras and gear, but nevertheless, it was very interesting to see the stage set-up. A warm-up comedian/host further coached us in what to expect during the taping process and also entertained us in a non-irritating manner. Often I’m put off by the warm-up comics, but this guy did his job very nicely. The band members were introduced to us one by one and did some warm-up playing before the show started; they were also consistently very entertaining, besides being terrific musicians.

Dave came out about 5 minutes before the taping began and did his own little warm-up with us, then they effortlessly flowed into the taping. There were no 2nd tapings of segments and during commercial breaks, they put up funny scenes from previous shows on the monitors over the stage to keep the natives from becoming restless. During the commercials the set was a hodge-podge of casually dressed assistants (some even in Bermudas) hovering around Dave or Alan Kalder. During the broadcast, assistants held up cue cards, just as is done in Tootsie. I found myself laughing much louder than I usually do, much more often than I usually do and certainly clapping like I never do. Everyone around us seemed to fall into the same behavior patterns as well.

The taping was completed, as promised, shortly after 6:30 and we were released in normal milling style (no organized exiting was required) out into the twilight of Broadway. I watched part of the show later and could appreciate how the audience’s participation is such an essential part of the production, but very forced when you actually study it. It would be a very different production if it weren’t for the prodigious coaching that goes into the audience’s preparation.

Would I do it again? Probably not. We had to hurry up and wait (on our feet) for long periods of time and provide free services. However, I can now cross the Letterman Show off my list of Things To Do.